


Into Dust

by melismatic



Series: Fairy Tale [3]
Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TV 2012), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: Break Up, F/M, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Sad, Sad Ending, Tragic Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-22
Updated: 2017-02-22
Packaged: 2018-09-26 07:00:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9872642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/melismatic/pseuds/melismatic
Summary: Raph is sitting where he knows Mona lands when she visits. The same is happening as usual, but for some reason Raph doesn't feel a thing. Making him break even more.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own TMNT and once again this is a dark series.

* * *

 

 

“You’re here?”

He felt her eyes on him, this dark spot where the wind didn’t touch. 

“Really surprised?” He still didn’t glance, feeling her presence come closer before shoulder to shoulder. Her head laid on his shoulder, his arm went around her waist because that’s what he’s supposed to do.

“No” her voice was quiet, getting lost in the darkness along with everything else. “You’ll start begging me to stay again?” she laughed, a humorless one with a bite that only made Raph snort.

“Maybe.” He took out a cigarette, feeling her glare as he lit it then brought it to his lips. “Problem?” He exhaled, a smirk came easily. Practiced and careful, one he’s expected to have.

“You know how I feel about that Earth habit…”

“Yeah.” He said simply, her glare still there and he couldn’t find it in him to care.

Years ago, he would have…

She’s still glaring. He hears a huff and those eyes are off him. Her fingers trace his arm, then up to his bicep as he exhales smoke.

There’s no noise, only her breaths as she traces his arm. Usually, he’d feel a rise but lately nothing. Nothing at all.

“It’s beautiful out.”

He only gives a nod, he’s been out here before. Having a feeling this is where she lands, but he never trusted himself to go. Always feeling he’d break more if he did yet now…

He can hear her sigh and feel her move into his lap. His thoughts so off, he can look past her even with her in front of him.

“You’re not saying anything today...you barely said anything last time as well. You need to say something. You know I can’t stay....”

He looked at her then, seeing her smile from the feel of his eyes.

“We should spend what little time we have talking, spending time together. Right? So, you should talk to me...”

He kept looking at her, feeling her hand against his cheek and his hand went on top of hers. He knew this answer, the old him would know it at the drop of a hat.  His hand entwined with hers, lacing their fingers and he could see her smile more.

It was an innocent question. Such innocent words as those eyes looked at Raph, expectantly.

“Yeah.”

Her smile was bright, the right answer again. And her head tilted. “Well?”

“Hm?”

Her leaned forward, a tongue trailed down his neck, and he pulled her away, looking at her as her own eyes showed confusion. “Raphael...I don’t ha-”

He pressed his nose to hers, and it was silent as his brow ridges furrowed. His hands gripping her arms, as he pressed them so close his snout was hurting.

“What are you doing?” Her hands were against his plastron, trying to push but over the years, he’d gotten stronger. “Raphael!”

This used to be right…

“What are you doing! Stop!” His grip went loose, and the sudden pain to his cheek had his eyes snapped open to look at the glaring salamandrian in his lap. She was glaring, trying him, urging him as her hands pushed forward and he let his shell hit the surface below them. Then she went still, by now he’d usually be doing something…

“Raph?”

He looked up at her, she rarely called his nickname, it sounded odd from her lips.

“What’s wrong with you?”

He blinked, looking up at her. Something turned and twisted inside him, and he laughed. Laughed hard, his body trembling and shaking. He was feeling…

He was feeling…

He crashed their mouths together, she wanted this. He wanted that. He’d never be that again, and the realization was so funny…

He bit at her neck, hearing her moan before kissing her. Who cared if it was wrong? Who cared? There was no one left to care…

And he kissed her again and again, wanting to moan with her. To chur. To feel, and the laughter bubbled inside him even more until he was holding her and hugging her. And he didn’t know what else to do. Everything was running together…

“Raphael?”

And he was Raphael again…

He did what she wanted, and that left him with…

With what?

He could feel her shift, and her move. And something broke. And then the laughter just...

Stopped.

He looked down, and she was there. And his head just hurt, and she was talking. He couldn’t hear her. And he clawed there more. Because maybe it was under the skin. Maybe he was there. Maybe it was all there?

And then he’d laugh at all this later. He’d feel something. Anything at all. Because she was everything, he wanted. He wanted her. She wanted him…

And that was everything…

That she wanted him...

He wasn’t a freak…

He wasn’t a monster…

He wasn’t...

He wasn’t...

And he…

He...

“Raphael, I’m leaving.”

His head snapped up, looking up at her. His eyes squinted, he remembered her being…

He looked down again then back up at her. She was leaving, and it was nothing new. Nothing new at all, yet he couldn’t even remember…

“Don’t come back...” The words slipped, and her eyes widened, staring at him and he stared back. He was supposed to take it back, he knew he was.

“You don’t know what you’re saying so…”

“Don’t come back…”

“I love you…”

That was expected.

“Raphael?” She looked at him, that same expectant look.

He didn’t say anything.

And she didn’t come back.

  
  
  


* * *

 


End file.
